I'm in a little bit of a predicament... I have been dating someone since pretty much January and we dont have sex yet, but I can feel that the time is gettting near and I still haent told him about the H. I was debating if it was worth it to tell him and risk his reaction or break up with him and give another reason for why. It's never easy to tell anyone but it's worse in this case because he knows my family and I'm afraid to be "exposed" and have people treat me differently. I almost told him on two seperate occasions this weekend but I couldnt do it. I know, I know, if he really loves me and cares about me he wouldnt care right? As many times as I say that in my head I cant make myself believe that because if the tables were turned, i.d.k. if I would do it...I think I would for him but I cant say for sure because it's easy for me to say that now cuz I have it. He mentioned someone he knows having it and he made some comments and I got defensive and he asked me why I was so defensive and did I have it and I clammed up and said no when that was the perfect opportunity to put it out there. Then this weekend, he was on my computer and he was typing something in the address bar and the resolve website "herpes cure" thingy popped up. I saw it but he didnt say anything at first so I wasnt sure if he noticed, then a little later he asked me why I had gotten so defensive about the topic the other night so I'm pretty sure he saw it. We talked about it a little bit but he didnt ask me if I had it again and then he didnt bring it up again. I'm driving myself crazy behind this...One of the reasons I'm so freaked out is because I'm to the point where I'm like F it, I need to just tell him no matter what the consequences because feelings on both sides are way too deep and I dont hide anything from him but this but we got really close to having sex a little over a week ago but I stopped it. I let him touch me and we were doing some heavy dry humpin but I had my under garmets on still. I was paranoid he may be at risk from that but I talked to advice nurses and Herpes councelors and they said that from the contact we had it would be pretty much impossible. He hasnt said anything about symptoms and I know that symptoms can vary but the past two relationships I had where my partners were infected, they got their symptoms just as fast as I got mine when I was first infected (less than a week). I'm afraid that he will freak because I let it get that close without mentioning it!!! I feel like an awful person for even allowing myself to get in a relationship with him...This is the worst thing ever right now and it's been putting me under a lot of stress. Any suggestions and opinions from you guys would be greatly appreciated...I'm in a pretty bad place right now :( I think the main reason I go the acyclovir was because if I do tell him and he is okay with it, I wanna let him know that I'm willing to do anything in my power try and prevent him from getting it...by the way...does anyone know how much lower the risk of passing is with suppressive therapy and condoms? Ahhhhh...I'm gonnna stop babbling me but this is really consuming me and I was even really suicidal and self destructive since that incident. I've been under so much stress, I've lost about 10lbs since the incident occured. Anyways, all I can do is pray and try and figure out what I'm gonna do and ho I'm gonna do it...Sorry for being a downer but I'm outta my head right now!!!
I'm still waiting on my blood test results to come. They send them in the mail so I'll know what type I am for sure soon. I've been taking the acyclovir since Thursday but I'm still having some minor tingling...I think...I'm so obbsessed with this, my mind may be playing tricks on me but it could be possible since I'm under so much stress. I hope everyone is well...
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hi, i really feel for you, i really do. By the sounds of it he might have some idea, especially asking you about it after you saw him type on the address bar and it came up (damn technology!) Look, as far as i see it, you must, and i mean must, how do i put it, not good with words, but you must be a super caring person who cares deeply about others, otherwise you wouldn't be feelig like this.Theres nothing to feel bad about because you stopped anything happening as close as it was, and if you decide to tell him he will understand what you have been going through.You are human and you want this man, but your head is fighting you i know.He will not expose you i think, especially since he knows your family, that would be a very, very low thing to do and if he has a conscious he would feel like shit for a long time.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean if the tables were turned, but it almost impossible to gage your own reaction should it be the other way around.
It is like another step in starting a relationship that others don't have to worry about and destroys the minds of caring people who have it, it would be alot easier if you were just a bitch who doesn't care, it really would be, but unfortunetly you are a beautiful, caring person which is obvious to me.
I can't give you advice really, as your a girl and i a boy, but i told the girl i was seeing and she was like, " well just wear a condom,,,no sweat, what you worried about".I was like "what planet are you from" lol
Anyway, everyone is different but i will tell you how i see it ok....
For starters, this man has been with you for 9 months and knows your family, to me thats quite awhile and knowing that i can gurantee you he would keep anything you told him confidential,even though you will feel embarrassed telling him. Now, you haven't had sex with him, in Australia that would be a record i think, and he is still keen and still there with you, to me this guy sounds awsome and i want him for myself, lol(dont stress, im not gay, he just sounds to good to be true.)
So yes, it seems your very lucky to have this man in your life, and since i been thinking about it, i think you need to say something to him, but you obviously like him heaps and heaps which makes you super scared to tell him.
Believe me, you will feel like the world has been lifted off your shoulders once it is out.
Easier said then done though i admit, i stumbled thru it bigtime.
I wish it was called something different, herpes is a crap name, they should of come up with something better, i could of for sure.
If i was in a relationship where i loved the girl to death and she knew about it, it wold never bother me again. But i will have to go thru the same thing you are and it sux.
I dont know about the USA, but in Australia 1 in 6 or 7 has H, thats alot of people, and in the end it is only a skin infection whch doesn't do any harm really, and if you tell him and he seems cool with it you should both go a good doctor to talk about it and to inform him.
Im not good at giving advice, or have never tried to really, but i hope i have done something for you, it really tore me up reading your message, take care mate.
Irrespective of receiving daily oral or future injectable depot therapies, these require health care visits for medication and monitoring of safety and response. If patients are treated early enough, before a lot of immune system damage has occurred, life expectancy is close to normal, as long as they remain on successful treatment. However, when patients stop therapy, virus rebounds to high levels in most patients, sometimes associated with severe illness because i have gone through this and even an increased risk of death. The aim of “cure”is ongoing but i still do believe my government made millions of ARV drugs instead of finding a cure. for ongoing therapy and monitoring. ARV alone cannot cure HIV as among the cells that are infected are very long-living CD4 memory cells and possibly other cells that act as long-term reservoirs. HIV can hide in these cells without being detected by the body’s immune system. Therefore even when ART completely blocks subsequent rounds of infection of cells, reservoirs that have been infected before therapy initiation persist and from these reservoirs HIV rebounds if therapy is stopped. “Cure” could either mean an eradication cure, which means to completely rid the body of reservoir virus or a functional HIV cure, where HIV may remain in reservoir cells but rebound to high levels is prevented after therapy interruption.Dr Itua Herbal Medicine makes me believes there is a hope for people suffering from,Cancer,Hiv_ Aids,Herpes,Copd,Diabetes,Hepatitis,I read about him online how he cure Tasha and Tara so i contacted him on drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com even talked on whatsapps +2348149277967 believe me it was easy i drank his herbal medicine for two weeks and i was cured just like that isn't Dr Itua a wonder man? Yes he is! I thank him so much so i will advise if you are suffering from one of those diseases Pls do contact him he's a nice man.
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